My world has lost its colour.
All i see is black and white,
and shades of grey.
I don't want the world to see me like this.
I need my haven of peace.
To friends who care:
Thank you for walking with me all this way.
To those unknown:
Please give me my haven of peace.
~^* About The Gal *^~
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~^* About Me *^~
A girl by the name of iCeZ.
Born on 17th March 1983.
Enjoys Music: Listening, Playing & Singing inclusive.
Also crazy about basketball with the Slingers but moving further and further from it.
Pain Addiction = Wakeboarding.
I'm CoLd... So DoNt ToUcH Me...
Saturday, September 16, 2006 It has ended...
Today marked the first day of us going our seperate ways.. I had wished that it never did come but it did and now i must learn to carry on without him. I had thought that it was just a joke but somehow we both knew that it would hurt for both of us to carry on that way as friends. He was having problems which he couldn't share, and i knew i couldn't help in 'cos if i'm not mistaken, it was because of her. And he knew that it had an impact on me 'cos the next night, i was down and spent the night walking from marina to clark quay, mos where he was and smsed him when i was outside. Once again he said he was not worth my effort.. I guess that was when he decided that we should put an end to it all 'cos the next night he messaged and reminded me that we had 4 days left, that he couldn't wait for it to come and acted like a total jerk. I replied saying that if he wanted me to hate him, he has achieved it. He said it was for the better for both of us. And so yesterday we played our last match. We lost. And i'm sorry to my guys for all my nonsense which they have tolerated all the way. I know i did a bad job and said stuff which didn't sound too good. All this would not have happened if i did not break my words. I should not have fallen for one of the guys. They have to bear the consequences of losing a team-mate 'cos of my stupid actions. I'm sorry. I tried to hard not to show my emotions in front of him or the rest of the team but when he left, i couldn't keep it in any longer. I messaged him "its ironic how this was the place where i first knew about you and this is where it ends. take care. good bye." He replied, "If not for the promise i had given you, they would have got it. take care. bye." At that moment, i broke down. The promise... one that he made when he first joined us and lastly at the dinner.. that he will keep his temper down and not start a fight.. a promise he gave me. Would it have been better if the promise was not kept, 'cos i would then have a reason to hate him. 'Cos i don't know how to move on without him, without loving him, without someone to turn to cheer me up when i'm down and share my troubles with.. He will still continue to have that spot in my heart.. 'cos i know i'll never quite let go, with all the memories that we've shared being so near me.. I'll miss you.
